Guardianship process begins
From equals to
This week has been one of the most important on our journey so far.
It’s a decision made to pursue the guardianship of mi Divina. Shade is not able to manage decision-making. She has lost the understanding of financial matters & even some very plan easy tasks, like hair washing.
Once a very logical, & responsible person, she is unlearning those talents. It’s a slow unraveling of them while she tries to concentrate on pushing back the possessor of her mind. Convinced that she is possessed instead of ill, she is trying to save the world inside her head. It’s a tiring task which takes most of her energy.
It has become an arch rival, this unseen monster that consumes my daughter. Thinking she is not allowed to care for her mundane, she is “blocked” off from random things. Never knowing when it will be serious or trivial. The random stopping in the middle of the driveway when we go grocery shopping. We are back to holding hands while crossing the streets as we did when she was a child.
An adult in physicality, growing younger in mind, is what I see many days. Some days after good rest, in the middle of a shot cycle, my beautiful grown adult daughter will reappear with an opinion or consideration on a topic of family interest.
This guardianship is something she wishes, It is a relief to her, yet I am going along with her wishes. She wants me to be her caretaker continually & make arrangements for her after my departure.
The transition from independent able adult woman, to a somewhat helpless disabled young lady, brings such heartache, mostly for me, because her emotions are blocked either by the illness or by the medication.
Our visit to the lawyer was exciting for her. I could see the sense of relief she had. It was a bit overwhelming for me. The retainer to get started is $5000. It’s the reason it’s taken time to get started. It’s not like most of us have that amount just sitting around looking for a bucket to fill.
It took some planning for me to pay off our summer vacation from the credit cards. Now, once those balances were eliminated & Shade’s other medical debt under control, it was time to go sign the contract.
We still don’t really have much of an idea how the process will unfold. This is just the beginning stages. Charge the card and signing of the contract.
Shade was somewhat disappointed yesterday while there, thinking we were going to say more or someone would ask questions. It was just a contract signing.
It was a lovely day though. The office is so beautiful in a famous historic building. The lawyer has had years in this location. It just beams with the good deeds and loving work they provide for families.
I’m not sorry for getting this going. It will be for the best. The only apprehension is really only the ability to pay for it, as it is a lifetime relationship, between not only shade and I, but also the lawyer, the office, the court, and the others that will be appointed to Shade’s interests by the court.
We walked out of the beautiful old mansion grasping our folder with gold leaf branding, and the stocking stuffers they had prepared for their clients for Christmas.
Shade was smiling with fulfillment. I hope she feels safe and loved. Pretty sure she does. Now, it’s time for me to find a support system to carry on.
Therapy or a support group are the next things to find. It would have been done by now if people would answer the phone???
Others are reaching out with information and resources. We toss these into the chat immediately to share with everyone. No waiting for a newsletter with updates for the most important part of our cause, getting help to those who need it along the way.
The guardianship is a lifelong commitment to care for all Divina’s needs. If you have already started this process in the state of Florida. I could use any tips [council] you have!
Stay Positive | Be Blessed | Share Often
LaLa 👋
Anything with lawyers and the courts can be a hard process. I hope the best for you. I think when these hoops are jumped through, things will get a little bit easier. At least I hope so.