The challenges of medicine

Have to have faith that it's going to even out in the long run. 🫶

Feb 01, 2025

Ups and downs of new medicine -Substack Image Generator

The last couple of weeks have been quite challenging for Shade. Between the medication changes and dealing with her own body, she’s quite withdrawn at the moment.

She is not in a space emotionally where she really wants to share companionship, yet she’s starting to grieve the loss of her partner. Divina reached out to David in text, and it just didn’t even matter to him to respond. Not a Hi, No hello, not even a fuck off.

We weren’t even sure he was still alive at this point. He’s not in the old apartment they shared. His presort mail is coming back to our house, so he’s not forwarding it anywhere else.

It turns out, that when we had earlier in the month, changed the payment of Shade’s phone over to my credit cards, so that we could make sure it would be paid, they were tied together on a family plan. Changing Shade’s also changed David’s method of payment automatically. He didn’t know, we didn’t know, until the card was charged for the 2nd phone.

I reached out to David to see if he could make arrangements to correct his phone. He did immediately. He didn’t hesitate. His responses were short, direct, and to the point. “Sure.” A quick phone call to the phones’ customer service line resolved the payment issue. [I will note: MINT was very quick to resolve this hiccup and their customer service was very professional regarding the whole matter.-Not my choice of phone service, but has worked well for Shade under the circumstances]

What it did not resolve was the broken heart and spirit of my precious little girl. The questions begin internally, I imagine for her as well as for me.

Why is it you cannot answer your wife?
What is going on that you just ghost the only person who ever had your back?
If you're going to leave, why haven’t you divorced her?
What is this trial of ignoring Shade and responding to her mom?
How long is this limbo going to continue, married yet non-existent?

Last weekend, it looked like she was overcoming all the changes in her medicines. It appeared she was coming down slowly from the Caplyta and Cobenfy. They just are not a match for her. The voices were darker and more turbulent. Her moods would change quite frequently and rapidly, from somewhat cheerful to downright sad, though she has not displayed any sadness outside, like tears or sullen faced, she gets very quiet, pensive, and her eyes glare into you when you speak to her, or look away to concentrate inside.

It is just troubling to not be able to take away her confusion, pain, and sorrow.

Hopefully, we’ll have more time this week to keep everyone up to date. It’s so important that when she is awake, she has company. There is no writing in her presence, not because she objects, but because she simply needs the attention more.

So writing about her journey takes place at the JOB, or late at night while she sleeps. Your patience & emotional support has been so outstanding here on Substack.

A brave community of lovely people is emerging to share their experiences , to open up the dialogue. Keep supporting those authors who are so courageous to share. The more we write, the more keep arriving to share. We need their voices. The world needs to know they feel, grow, love, and try to connect with humanity, just a bit differently. We can learn to love them in a way that translates to their love language.

Listening, and sharing their voices is the best support we can offer, because there are still many, like Shade, who cannot yet speak or share for themselves. They deserve the help to get there.

Someone I met this week is writing about some of the organizations in place and how they function. Check out a different

David

he’s OkayDave and his @Mental Notes When I get a chance, i’ll add him to the article below…

Until then

Stay Positive | Be Blessed | Share Often

LaLa 👋